A great many years ic alp. It began in a linguistics book in faterest at first, ot I o do one taiters and fal N’s t ttle n’s and capital K’s t ttle k’s. Otters, n’s and d’s and s’s and z’s, tle tails and loops attac’s. I loved t turned into j’s, and v’s t pery o’s like perf dogs on balls at taug ernational pic alp, I discovered, you could e looked like mat looked like secret code, looked like lost languages.
I needed a lost language. One in . I used to e one special er’s name. A talisman. I folded to elaborate miniature ami, kept my pleat of paper alo me. I lived in my coat pocket; in summer it tickled my ankle i nig my alrack of ts of paper. I lost tried to prize one from my fingers, I s to t o read it. But tom of a dra, I did noto stop name, o break, and o me, were full of sorrow.
o speak but, raising my fio my lips, I anded tried to s ed tet tried to keep to her now.
I prized t a t on t tasted its dry, ang, and sen years my parents rying tet. it in a sileny own. And remember.
Alongside my mispronunciation of een languages, and my ability to recite t for, random over from my bookis only to amuse myself; its purpose in te, so as ticular effort to practice it. t is o paper to capture ts and fricatives, trills of Emmeline’s urges.
After t on t my line of squiggles and symbols and signs. as it accurate? Doubts began to assail me. ely after my five-minute journey bato tion of tic alp itself adequate? if my first failed attempts aminated my memory?
I en on t again, urgently. aited for to tell me I it rig ravestied transcription of somet was useless.
I e t name instead. talisman.
It ill alone.
I screo a ball and kicked it into a er.
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