er’s diary ed t it left e stains on your fingers. t tuck togeted into t o a broo dirt and damp togetorn; along tantalizing list ments: abn, cr, ta, est. orst of all, it seemed t t some point been submerged ied; s intehiess.

        It    o cause me test difficulty.    a page, it    it . Not any old script, eit er’s. able slant,    funal gaps. But on a closer look, t? as tion to be read as bet or lost?

        It o be quite a puzzle. Altly made a transcript of t day train oo croo permit pencil and paper. I , diary close to my nose, and pored over to task of decip first, to to e o meet me, res ions, until I o turn t train, tmas, er came to life.

        I    test your patience by reprodug er’s diary    came to me: fragmented and broken. In t of er idied and put in order. I ter. I    ainty, sy, laae ance. In doing so, I may    o    se, but I    promise t if I akes, it is only in t matters I ed and scrutinized until I am as sure as sure    be t I inguished her inal meaning.

        I do not give tire diary, only aed sele of passages. My cated first by questions of relevao my purpose, ell tory of Miss inter, and sed by my desire to give an accurate impression of er’s life at Angelfield.

        Angelfield    enoug a distance, alt faces tioned, but on approatly tate of dilapidation it o fall into.

        Ses of toing. And it did look as ts of torm-damaged. I s apriority to ctis.

        t tries to , I uood immediately t sy seeing and    age, t also explains tate of t I suppose t    to t after a lifetime’s servi ty, to see w be ronger hands.

        Mrs. Duold me about t most ly reduced staff for years no o be accepted as part of te    ascertained, but    tside ting anymore), but ter takes instru from tor ate manager—so far as tate ma. It is Mrs. Dunne    Cs eac Mrs. Dunne only laug s to go making lists of figures in a book. I ot    t t I trust I ion of being a good-ed,     is my    er I so ascribe itirely to deafness. I made a o demonstrate to Mr. Angelfield tages of keeping accurate records and t t I migo uake too busy to do it.

        P to t time I met my employer, and could not old me ire day in t it is not    to leave it. After a great many questions I eventually ascertai    pity! Is tion ed?

        Mrs. Dunne gave me tea (o drink out of politeness, but later to teacup, ate of te a little about ies, never married, and urally enougalk turo t it is t departure of to an asylum for t precipitated my e. Sorted at of ts t precipitated ttal t I could not make out tacked tor’s    ters; clearly tory of disturban t beat a little faster isfa is tion of minds t already run in smootrammeled lines?    ing ordered t and tidy? I am not only ready for t years longing for it.    h!

        I inquired after till,    on tures. Mrs. Duell me very little, tead, ses about to read bet me to), tained s of somet ss is not at all likely, not in England at least, and I suspect    fanciful. tion is a    many stific discoveries could not    it, but it o be o some serious object if it is to e to anyt to s o tends to lead into silliness. Per is age t makes    t to i gossip for t. In any case, I immediately put topic firmly from my mind.

        As I e tside my room. t of t to suit t enormously from t I mean to instill in t go out to t t me to, and it    my purposes to discert t tage.

        Mrs. Dunne s, and curtains atters, t see it and time of taff t may be beyond saving, but I    may be full of kno is here.

        t ing to infliany stairs at onrs. Dunne. On t floor I became a to t on to t is a cardinal rule t I do not c train to e to me. t terrible disorder. Dirty, but I o expect t. Rainer ed as mug floorboards. truly un iing t out to    someone could fall doairs or at t t an ankle. All t I s t set curtains fluttering, t is impossible to tell exactly whey e from.

        I returo t to eat food cooked in pots as unpleasant as t stuto a great pile of    t    a close eye on ion. S.

        t e doo eat. I called ond no more. Mrs. Dunne    I told    I    be on my side.

        tor came to dine. As I o expect, t appear. I    tor    t o find it entirely normal. So it    to    at table, but needing mucor is an intelligent, cultivated man. o see t great lengties I am likely to faed eness as I could muster. Any governess, after ture of task aing     see iresome it is to    lengt one ood. My fidgeting and t sirely escaped ice, and I fear t ical skills are not mat. I do not criticise ing everyoo be less able t, ed an air of quiet modesty, but I see t easily enougly t in t I aken on, and s making e ings.

        I    from doairs. Presumably try door. trated, but rain to proper mealtimes? And    mealtimes, ored?

        tomorroart by ied to    t told myself no. It omorroains t are so t. So tonig, but tomorro o restore order and disciplio to succeed in my aim must first of all make myself a    room to t surrounded by hygiene and order.

        t is time for me to meet my charges.

        I    I tle time for my diary lately, but I must make time, for it is g t I record and develop my methods.

        Emmeline I s ttern of be c, I turbed as ed, and o be a nice ate and sturdy, o appreciate ts of s ite and    be made to obey instrus by kind coaxing and treats. So uand t goodness reeem of ots o reduce t ts of my metever my strengt is to start h.

        I am tent h my work on Emmeline.

        er is a more difficult case. Violence I ructiveness. ruck by oructiveness is generally a side effect e and not its primary objective. t act, as I    in ot frequently motivated by an excess of anger, and tp of tally damaging to people and property. Adeline’s case does not fit ts myself, aold of otru seems to be Adeline’s only motive, and rage someto tease out, stoke up in o gee to destroy. For stle ts only crumbs. Mrs. Dunne old me of one i in to rue, it is a great siful. It could be put t Jo    over tter, and it is not only topiary but t suffers from erest. I ime and a o restore    mosphe garden made orderly again.

        talking of Jo speak to    t ternoon, I o e    ed to close t to let any more damp in; t been so close to t pressed to t, I doubt I’d    trousers, cut off at t cast o get a clear impression of     is on practi rural areas for gage in icultural    it e tages of trade early, but I do not like to see any c of sco Jo it and make sure ands t spend school hours in school.

        But to return to my subject: o er is ed, s be surprised to kno, but I    all before. Jealousy and anger betly ened. itime I o minimise t in time stant vigilance is required to prevent Adeline ing er, and ts, o uand. Ser and could defend ing    on er; sionate soul.

        My first judgment of Adeline in t not ever e to live as indepe and normal a life as er, but o a point of balance, of stability, and ion of a strict routine. I did not expect ever t o uanding. task I foresaer ter, but I expected far less t, for it    I artled into modifying t opinion by signs of a dark and clouded intelligeo t, but    t displays of uned    as I    elling of a story, an adaptation I ers of Jane Eyre, a story loved by a great many girls. I rating on Emmeline, encing o folloory by animating it as muco to t, yet anoto torytelling ures and expressions as seemed to illustrate tions of ters. Emmeline did not take .

        Out of t a movement. Adeline urned ion. Still ed on ill    I inct impression sening to me. Even if tion    ; surned aeration in tate of animal unsciousness, today : t of tain tension. As if sraining toory, yet still trying to give t slumber.

        I did not    o see t I iced anytio look as if I o Emmeline. I maintaiion of my fad voice. But all time I ening. I caug    not at all—from between g me!

        It is a most iing development, and o I foresee erpin of my project here.

        t ued tor’s face c s o a dizzying s and present ted ne is in a    causes to s and dance about like t. I    optical effects, ped to lig t tion is rooted in t and rearra of ures caused me to stare at s, o ures , too, somet, ot fat I ot fathom.

        e stared at eacly .

        I . imes so tell    a book is not finisil it is finis move it,    it ba t came?    is t of leaving it on taircase?

        I ion he gardener.

        opiary is mending, and a ea and    tcimes I e across talking in lo not fe I    si is out of tion I am at a loss to explain    is. I taxed Mrs. Dunne , unanding about t part; I t t it    talk of not ters, co be killed, potatoes to be dug and talk so loed, and sold me it    lo all, at least not particularly so. “But you don’t alk lo is because shs.

        I ten all about tcil taking a    before lunc my c c or t all but spra under    as before. I stepped to ure on tance of education, but on seeing me o , clamped    to ed aer t. tly well    sco have a book in his hand.

        I    to Joold    . I told    allo o upset tion just for t if ts did not accept t, I old    o    I    extra staff, bot Jo t it better to    until I ed hings here.

        Joo s must be a village e    it imes, t    responsible for all truants old    I    tiged t    anyone could o, t there was no such child.

        I told Jotle a I ret, t I inteo speak to tress about it, and t I ly to ts and sort tter out o say it o do    do as I liked (and I certainly s o y to of cer for o be obstructive, but tices it never did titudes are sloo die out in rural areas.

        I o legibility forced me to read slo ties, using all my experience, knoion to fles t    tacles seemed not to impede me. On trary, ties, to pulse h meaning, vividly alive.

        of my miirely a decision    tation ion, I found my mind made up. I    going er all. I o Angelfield.

        train to Banbury oo as travelers to sit, and I never read standing up. it of train, every jostle and stumble of my fello tangle of er’s diary against my c. I . t could .

        o you, er, I t. h did you go?
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