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首页mylifestory海伦凯勒Chapter XX

Chapter XX

        truggle for admission to college er Radcliffe    best t I sudy anot , til t my dream of going to college was realized.

        I remember my first day at Radcliffe. It erest for me. I o it for years.

        A potent force roronger even t, o try my strengtandards of t tacles in t I o overe taken to    t;to be banis to live outside of Rome." Debarred from t o make try by unfrequented roads--t    in college tling like me.

        I began my studies y and lig y to knos people, sery, manners, joys, tragedies sangible interpreters of ture- of t and t t of    going to tell anybody.

        But I soon discovered t college    quite tic lyceum I    ed my young inexperience became beautifully less and "faded into t of on day.”

        Gradually I began to find t tages in going to college.

        t and still feel most is lack of time. I used to ime to to reflect, my mind and I. e    togeten to t, ouc til t. But in college time to une s. One goes to college to learn, it seems, not to ters tals of learning, one leaves t pleasures--solitude, books and imagination--outside    to find some fort in t t I am laying up treasures for future enjoyment, but I am improvident enougo prefer present joy to    a rainy day.

        My studies t year ure. In t and Sainte-Beuve, and in tory from to teentury, and in Engliserature studied critically Miltons poems and "Areopagitica.”

        I am frequently asked ions under e as if elepures are spelled into my y of turer is lost to me in t to keep in t of a en miss. But in t I do not take notes. If tting    pell-mell speed, I s ttention to t under sideration or t is presented. I ake notes during tures, because my ening. Usually I jot do e ticisms as, tions, on my typeer, so t ty in finding out tle I knoin prosody, I devised and explaio my professor a system of signs indig t meters and quantities.

        I use typeer. I ried many mac adapted to type stles    be used, and one    tles, eac set of cers--Greek, Frencical, acc to ting one ypeer. it it, I doubt if I could go to college.

        Very feed for to o my ly I need more time to prepare my lessons t takes longer, and I ies tention I must give to details d t t I must spend ers,    I soon recover my buoyand laugent out of my . For, after all, every one rue kno climb ty alone, and sio t, I must zigzag it in my oimes, I fall, I stand still, I run against tacles, I lose my temper and find it again and keep it better, I trudge on, I gain a little, I feel enced, I get more eager and climb o see truggle is a victory. One more effort and I reac alitution for tru of t for me many of t. tfulness    to me they    ever know.

        Last year, my sed year at Radcliffe, I studied Englision, tion, ts of Amerid Europe, tin edy. tio. It ures eresting, vivacious, ty; for trur. Coil terature in all its inal fres ted to drink in ternal beauty of ters    needless interpretation or exposition. You revel in ts. You enjoy    testament, fetting tence of Ja you ;a glimpse of t perfe in al ruty bearing a em of time.”

        t because I am studying subjects t especially i me, eics, Elizabeterature, Stredge, and tory of Pers o traditions of remote ages and ot, w reason.

        But college is not t it    meet t and to face; one does not eveouc is true; but t extract t and analyze t ation. Many sc, it seems to me, t our enjoyment of t erature depends more upon tanding. trouble is t very feions sti ts overripe fruit. It is possible to kno and stem and all, and all t to ion of tiently, "ions and ; t like blind birds beating tual    mean to object to a t only to terminable ents and beicisms t teae t redge interprets er said, it is "as if new sig; .

        times o learn; for taxed mind ot enjoy treasure it    test cost. It is impossible, I to read in one day

        four or five different books in different languages and treating of    subjects, and not lose sigtes and examinations, ones brain bees encumbered    of co be little use. At t time my mind is so full eneous matter t I almost despair of ever being able to put it in order. er t    my ones, and o escape ts pursue me, until I wis I migo worship.

        But tions are times and cast te t, yet til like Bob Acres I feel my ce oozing out at my finger ends. take place are spent in cramming your mind iula and iible dates--unpalatable diets, until you he sea.

        At last t t time to call to your standard ts t    supreme effort. It oo often t your trumpet call is un is most perplexing and exasperating t just at t ies take to ts you e trouble invariably fail you at a pinch.

        "Give a brief at of ;    did rangely familiar. You ransack your budget of oric facts muc for a bit of silk in a rag-bag. You are sure it is some tion. But ions, scems of gover; but    all t on tion paper. In desperation you seize t and dump everyt, a, unscious of tastrop upon you.

        Just tor informs you t time is up. itense disgust you kick to a er and go ionary sco abolis of professors to ask questions    t of tioned.

        It es over me t in t ter I urn t me. Aaprutting about before me, pointing to tones and t tly tmospling, tumbling ideas I live in t I    t on a deliberate air to say t my ideas of college have ged.

        Radcliffe ill in ture, t; but in transition from romantic to actual I    tried t. One of tience, ion as ake a ry, leisurely, our minds ably open to impressions of every sort. Sucidal . "Kno; Rato o knorue ends from false, and lofty to knos and deeds t o feel t -ty turies; and if one does not feel in tions a riving, one must indeed be deaf to the harmonies of life.
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