Just as tamiid intellectual atmospudy and just as trangers and disturbers, yes, and as destroyers, into my carefully tended garden of music, so, too, from all sides tegrating influences upon my life t, till ise, and oo,    springing up beside t of old ones; making clamorous demands and creating fusion; and noure y ies and pursuits in roion, and I ed a picture of myself as a person    refined and educated specialist iry, musid p of me to be a tialities, instincts and impulses weppenwolf.

        Meanion of ty by no means a pleasant and amusing adventure. On trary, it en exceedingly painful, often almost intolerable. Often truly fiendiso my ears in t of surroundings o so very different a key. And many a time, ylisaurant among pleasure seekers and elegant rakes, I felt t I raitor to all t I o    sacred.    me for one raffig    not see inually under s of rebellion and escape in my face, and smiled at them.

        As tru of all t I y    on, I began to uand, too,    I e of all my despair. I began to perceive t t of my old ventional and lyiee ed er, student of Mozart and Goetap, upon genius and tragedy and y, t in a cell encumbered    by bit to self-criticism and at every point ing. ted and iing o be sure, pread ested against ty of t    let ood against a able and noble, but still a promise and no more. o tal a rial securities lying at    terest from t a pang of sce. And so it o be sure, rigged    finely as an idealist and ner of t and gro bottom, ook exception to a life like s taurant and tead of longing to be freed and pleted, rary, most early to get baes ual trifling     so to get bae before t aking a lesson from t. O I g to o t o ting ual, to al (to    timid and ludicrous dilettante of trait al ceristics    su of Goetual oble gaze sion of elevated t and y, until    overe by    last, ture stood badly in need of repairs! tably dismantled! ary tered breecudied no ed ead of ability and carrying on a o lost repute.

        I antly finding myself in timate of o be revised if only because    oy y, a little beau, and somey at t, as o dribble into oy trumpet and    e. Pablo,    ied in my opinions. t to ened esy, smiling as    ual reply. On te of t seemed t I erest. It        to please me and to sain irritation, and even ill less attempts at versation roubled and sorroaking my left roking it, tle gold snuffbox. It    ook a pinc immediate effect    I became clearer in t told me t Pablo     co er in tilling pain, for indug sleep, fettiiful dreams, lively spirits and the passion of love.

        One day I met reet ur oo apaime I succeeded at last in making alk.

        "; I said to ick, "you are a friend of    is erest in you. But I t say you make it easy to get on imes I tempted to talk about music    ed me to knos and opinions, ed mine or not, but you o make me even t reply."

        amiable smile and time a reply was accorded me.

        "ell," y, "you see, in my opinion t at all in talking about music. I alk about music.    reply, to make to your very able and just remarks? You ly rig, you see, I am a musi, not a professor, and I dont believe t, as regards music, t point in being rig depend on being rigaste and education and all t."

        "I does it depend on?"

        "On making musisity of , Monsieur. te    t a soul ter for it. But    gets into to ts t and t alone. Look at t t er a longisco laug is w;

        "Very good,    t only sensual music. tual also. Besides t is actually played at t, tal music t lives on even    actually being played. It an to lie alone in bed and to call to mind a melody from te or tt anybody bloo a flute or passing a bo;

        "Certainly,    by many a lonely dreamer. Even t typist i oep in aps ime to it. You are rig grudge all te music, e or Valencia. But e musi? t it from us, t must first    must    into t    and dream of it."

        "Granted," I said coolly, "all t    do to put Mozart a fox trot on t is not one and ternal music or cuff of t is fotten tomorro;

        o I tied,    o on    amiable expression and touess to his voice.

        "Aly rigo say to your putting Mozart and    levels you please. It is all oo me. It is not for me to decide about levels. I s t, perill be played in a , I t of every z and fox trot too. o do s acc to our duties and ifts. e o play ually in demand, and    as ifully and as expressively as ever ;

        it up. tting past the fellow.

        At many moments te oddly mixed    o one moment in bitter strife, at t in peace. Many a time to be dead and done o yrannizing and tradictory till ttle imes took t and squeezed . truggle, many a t of the razor blade.

        Often,     public exion of dang, I    into my bedroom at nigo my indescribable astonis, dismay, ment found the lovely Maria lying in my bed.

        Of all t    violent. For I    a moments doubt t it , as usually, been    evening. I o a recital of old ciful, to my past life, to territory of my ideal self. Bey Gotted vaulting sly life in ts, I e voice of a Baces of ts external dignity and sanctity o life all ted e a in ty cracted, a guest for an    tears o my eyes. I    ed for t. Dropping t I    evenings I    ists after sucs) and stealing a of treets, s jazz orcras unes of to live. O a dull maze of error I had made of my life!

        For long during ts ion to musid not for t time reized tal relation as tiny of tire German spirit. In t triarcure rules in to aent unknoellectuals, instead of fig tendency like men, and rendering obedieo t, t, are all dreaming of a speec    utters to tead of playing    as truly and ly as ellectual antly rebelled against t reason and courted musid so t, carousing in musi ions of sound, and ies of feeling and mood t y,    ter part of its practical gifts to decay. None of us intellectuals is at y. e are strao it and ile. t is ellect even in our oy, in our ory and politid public opinion, able a one. ell, I en pondered all t    an intense longing sometimes to turn to and do someto be seriously and responsibly active instead of occupying myself forever    estid intellectual and artistic pursuits. It alo destiny. tains of industry e rigo be made of us intellectuals. e    of taleerboxes for he razor.

        So, full of ts and t    rievably lost, I     last; climbed my stairs; put on t in my sitting room; tried in vain to read; t of tment    terness not only of myself, but of oo. S    and ki iions and s be a    ster all to let me perisead of drae, dazzling, dizzying world er and wed away.

        And so I    out t and taken myself to my bedroom and sadly begun to undress; and tomed smell. t aroma of st, and looking round I satle startled, h large blue eyes.

        "Maria!" I said. And my first ts    my landlady ice w.

        "Ive e," sly. "Are you angry ;

        "No, no. I see    t it?"

        "O does make you angry. Ill go again."

        "No, lovely Maria, stay! Only, just tonig be jolly tonigomorrain."

        I    doook o speak lo lay sely and .

        "You doo be jolly," s;old me t you roubles. Any one    uand t. tell me, till? t;

        I kissed s. A moment ago I    of terness and reproa my     evening. ts . Sloill my kisses reac.    me omnist and bountiful.

        During t by Marias side I did not sleep muc my sleep alked softly, a number of curious tales about rical ime, I o ts singular innod singular corruption. tly from poor    too intelligent and too pretty to give to some ill-paid and joyless imes on casual imes on tue. No at a typeer; at times resses of o-do men of t money and presents; lived at times in furs and motorcars, at otimes in attics, and t under some circumstances io marry, t at all eager for it. Many of ttle ination for love and gave t t price. Oted in love and uo do    it. tive friends -ed, intelligent aless, tterflies lived a life at once ot to be boug in good lud fine    ging to it far less to folloo le, alain, t, t a difficult and sad end ore for them.

        During t    nig folloaugaugs of t sanding, neel lou for me, t ae,    it sometrivial, forbidden, and degrading, ed. In t    and knes    a restaurant as one of us mig, and ture aion o craze in dances or timental cloying song of a jazz singer as one of us ozscalked to me about t imes, and sion and love as s t I asies of any ured person over artistic pleasures of t and most distinguisy. I o ent it migender looks tore large gaps in tics. to be sure a beauty, one and indivisible, small a, t seemed to me,    at top, to be above all dispute and doubt, but i our yout and for artists t today    and dismay?    t o us    and agner, and, to many of us, even    tio as pure aiful an artistic experiend exalted as far beyond doubt as ture of any academic big-ristan, or tasy of a ductor over t t?

        Maria too appeared to love tiful Pablo extremely.

        "ainly is a beauty," said I. "I like oo. But tell me, Maria, iresome old fello play a saxop sing any Englis;

        "Dont talk so ; s;It is quite natural. I like you too. You, too,    you t endears you and marks you out. I    . One oug to talk of t ted for. Listen,    you like me. You    tells me: You please eful to you for being pretty. t gives me great, great pleasure. And ts just te t pleases me, t    little of me and ferred a favor."

        Again o find my arm still about iful, beautiful flower.

        And tiful fle to say, tio be    io stand in front of o    of Eritervened—my distant, angry love, my poor friend. Sty t so blooming; and srained, and not so rictle arts of making love. Sood a moment before my eyes, clearly and painfully, loved and deeply o my destiny; t a ted distance.

        And so in tender beauty of t many pictures of my life rose before me    toucy. For moments toget stood still beternal stars and stellations. My der transfiguration like a distant glimpse over mountains into tany of my friends as clear as trumpets; ted by me    sea floer, o oo, appeared. I augrife and resignation. In spite of all tings of our life, my fiden ouco t against me aed me     must rayal to ed so deep and lifelong a wound.

        tures—t—all came back. t of t of love, and I k ts ructible and abiding as tars, tten, could never be erased. tory of my life, tarry lig    led to renunciation and not ter    of all    it o be proud of. It s c ttle o deat mig er and turned not on trifles, but on tars.

        time tle of all t passed t nigtle of all enderness of love, a fes of clear a nig time since my doing radiany os of ts    I o snatctered images and raise my life as eppeno ty of one picture, in order to enter myself into tion and be immortal. as not t for the progress of every human life?

        In ter er in took a little room in a neiger wings.

        true to ies, ress, appeared and I o learn ton. S release me from a single lesson, for it    I o attend tume, but so tell me anyt it. to visit o know will forbidden me.

        time, about ts o be t ure in t even t intellectual and, paratively speaking, educated o t ratantly opposed it. I took my problems and my ts o t terly impossible to love a girl for more t reading    inguiss. Sous substitutes. ly from t and task s rag tmost deligicular figure, emperament; and in employing every faculty, every curve and line and every softest modeling of o find responsive perceptions in o jure up in t. t sold me t t and t and carefully cultivated sensibility and ed by it. Certainly, too, it    t roduced me to t and the very significe of summer and of roses.

        It    my fortuo be Marias only lover, nor even e one. I en sime for me, often only an    midday, seldom a nigook no money from me. o t. Ss, tle purse of red lacquered leat be t. As a matter of fact, s me over t ers, about    time I tle learned as in any language of t deal from Maria. Before all else I lear t mere idle trifles ied by manufacturers and dealers for trary, a little or, ratative aiful, many sided, taining a multiplicity of to t in a magical ruments of love, from po to to cigarette case, from -buckle to ic material of love, of magid deligtle cry.

        I often inguis Pablo a some Maria assured me t t took a long time to er or riding master.

        In t to knos about t, jazz musis, actors and many of ties and by degrees (tire strao treated    oo. It . At times soo, availed    drugs and s for me also; and Pablo    markedly on t to be of servie. One    more ado: "You are so very un is bad. One s be like t. It makes me sorry. try a mild pipe of opium." My opinion of telligent, c time, uook some of    my affair . Oained us in op floor of an el in to sit on ttle bottles, a mysterious and o a very good o celebrate a love y for tly. Sue. ole a gla Maria to see ook it, and t once backed up my refusal I sa tion cost . Pablo ed by my refusal but not . "Pity," ;oo morally minded. Noto be done. All t iful! But Ive got anot; tle opium to smoke, and sitting motionless    ed to us . As I felt a little u ting breatook t came from Maria, but I kne came from him.

        And one evening ill more. ing to me in my room old me t y frand ead of .

        "Pablo," I said, very muc;you dont knoer for a ed among us as t degradation. I    ;

        me y. "You dont    to, ies for yourself. Dont sleep tonig. But give me t back. I    need of it."

        " for?"

        "Fostino, ttle sed violin, you knoer    a sou, nor    t."

        From curiosity and also partly to punis o Agostino. ook milk and medie to tid a c ly and effitly like a good siurse. till day Bar.

        I often talked at lengtail about Maria    her hands and shoulders and hips and her way of laughing and kissing and dang.

        "; asked o me a peculiar play of tongue in kissing. I asked o s me    s ear in ;t is for later. I am not your love yet."

        I asked ed s as    could be knoo her lovers.

        "O; s;er all. Do you ts from one anot say youve got iful girl. t;

        "All ts from eacold    me?"

        "No, ts a uand. Maria is unate. But bet a notion of. Naturally I told    about you, muc time. I o and you as I uand you. Ive learned somet you from old me all about you as far as s all. I kno toget;

        It erious to knoed relations rose before me, neies in love and life; and I t of teppeise.
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