tar ed and vanis in torks fles wurned.

        ernoon, during a lig go into ter; from tal    immediately to ,    the horse.

        Eric a s first glance, and     out to greet ely different: a false Goldmund, many years older, , dusty, gray face, sunken c a smile rated, old, patient smile. o be ill aired.

        trangely at ant.    urn. ed as t even for a minute. ing, no question, no story. ;I must sleep," o be terribly tired.    Erito    to t it drop, took off o tanding under a clot did not go up to o take off t ead    to ttle side, and called doo ;Eric tell anybody t Im back. Im very tired. It     until tomorro;

        ter a o look into a small mirror t tentively    tared back at    of tired and old and ed,     man le mirrors dull surface—but strangely unfamiliar. It did not seem to be properly present; it did not seem to be of muco    remile of Master Niklaus, a little of t    made for tle of St. Jacob in t. Jacob    still joyous and good.

        Carefully erested in finding out about tranger. o    o t remely tired old man, ake muc    ill liked    tty Goldmund    igue and disiion trace of te, or at least of detac. ly to    rip! Pretty mu and burned out, urning from tle excursion.    only sacrificed coo, ten lost or deserted    o iable, but ent, it o get along     back to bed and time fell asleep.

        t day    able io dratle. Narcissus came to visit ood in t;Ive been told t you    e to see me, Ive e to you. Am I disturbing you in your ;

        of o t. Goldmund gave him a friendly smile.

        "Yes, Im back. ele, Narcissus, o you."

        Narcissus looked into oo sa only tion, tiful ing ely pleasing signs of acceptance, of detac even, of surrender and old mans good    t Goldmund    altoget eity and anding at tes t lead to the beyond.

        "Are you ill?" iously.

        "Yes. I am also ill. I fell ill at tart of my journey, during t days. But youll uand t I didnt    to e    araveling boots. No, I didnt feel like it. I    on to roam about a bit; I felt as . I oo muc asand t, youre an intelligent man. Five me,    s like a curse; I keep fetting alking about. But t t     a lot, but …"

        his murmuring ended in a smile.

        "ell make you ake care of you. If only you urned rig o feel as of us. You s back."

        Goldmund laughed.

        "Yes, no dare e back. It would    now I ;

        " pain?"

        "Pain? Yes, I    you see, pains are not so bad; t me to reason. No of you. to see me in prison, to save my life, I o ceet as of you. But t is pletely over no;

        Narcissus put ely Goldmund stopped speaking and closed urbed, t ran to fet, to look after till sitting fast asleep at able. t o bed and tayed to examine him.

        o one of t a stant ch.

        tory of    journey ails; oten lessly. Sometimes imes    for eacime. t versations remely important to him.

        Narcissus set dos of Goldmunds reports and fessions. Otold by Erich.

        "art? At t and fell o a brook, er. I must . At t time I    very far from    I didnt    to turn back. t    it oo mucal for a long time.

        "Ill stay ayed a t: before I go under, I    to dra more, and make a fe to er all."

        Narcissus said to ;Im very glad youve e back. I missed you very muc of you every day, and I en afraid t you    to e back."

        Goldmund s;ell, t ."

        Narcissus,    burning    doo    ouis first, and t had happened.

        "Goldmund," t    being able to tell you earlier. I s to you to see you in your prison in t statues, or at so many otimes. Let me tell you today    to me,     mean very muco you. You are used to love; it is not rare for you; so many . My life    of life. Our Abbot Daniel oold me t    I ; . I am not unjust tos to be just and patient    I e of    love is, it is because of you. I o love you, you alone among all men. You agine    means. It means a , a blossoming tree in t is to you alo my     dried up, t a place o grace."

        Goldmund smiled ly embarrassed. it, calm voice ; day and    you, tle Bless. I uood t you    because of me, and I . No it    you really do love me. But I    c you. I kne you, too,    I never dared    you ell me some day, youre sud I t."

        tood in tg.

        "Do you tantly of deat; asked Narcissus.

        "Yes, I t and of ual as you o to t easy for me to find my joys t I dont en beeremely unate enougo learn t sensuality    be given a soul. Of it art is born. But no in me. I no longer asy, and I     it noill running after me. And to create    is no longer my ues; t matter. t is time for me to die. I am ready, and Im curious about it."

        "; asked Narcissus.

        "ell, it may be a bit stupid of me. But Im really curious about it. Not of t t very little, and if I may say so openly, I no longer believe in it. tree is dead forever; t e back to life, nor does a man after io ter    t doesnt last lo dying only because it is still my belief or my dream t I am on to    as t of love, fulfilled love. I ot give up t t, instead of deat o take me back to o nonbeing and innoce."

        During one of    visits, after Goldmund    said anytalkative.

        "Faton t often be i pain.    so calmly, Goldmund? It seems to me you ;

        "Do you mean peace    peace I    found. I dont    any peaeed to praise it, and tle    good at bearing pain, and altimes t dying o me, I    face it. I ill muco and too o die; to break eao is different."

        Speaking tired o spare himself.

        "No," ;I    to tell you. Before to tell you. Itll make you lauged my    day and rode a just riding off into t t uro t ress Agnes , t does not seem important to you, and today it does not seem important to me eit at t time tself into me, and I t of not Agnes. S beautiful o see ed to be er a iful. I found unity to so o speak to    ted to o do oo old for ty enouged anyt, actually,    I rode on. I didnt    to e back to you so disappointed and ridiculous, and as I rode along, ford youtelligence ely abandoned me, because I stumbled into a gully o a stream and broke several ribs and lay ter. ts    real pain. As I fell I felt somet, and to , I ent . I lay ter and kne I    to die, but everytely different from t nigs prison. I    it; dying no longer seemed terrible to me. I felt t pains    to call it. I lay t and I    t    asy and love. And t it    o pluy . ood t, it no longer . And no eaking my    out. S it. Sometimes sasy. Sometimes sender sounds. Sometimes s    s t me and dra of my c."

        Again and again ;Do you remember?"    days. "I ely fotten my motil you jured    day, too, it    very mucearing at my iines. e ill young tty young boys. But even to folloiful madonna; sasy. Sino;

        "Dont speak so muc; said Narcissus. "ait until tomorro;

        ito Narcissuss eyes,     back from    looked at times so old and fragile, a little senile perhen again like pure kindness and wisdom.

        "My dear friend," ;I ot    until tomorro say fareo you no I must tell you everyten to me anot. I ed to tell you about my mot. For many years it    c dream to make a statue of to me t sacred of all my images; I ery. Only a s o t I mig atue; my life urned out: it is not my    s is    s, s, sying me; so dying and iful statue, t motill see it, and if I . But s    t; s    me to make    visible. Ss me to die. Im glad to die; s easy for me."

        Deeply seo o bend close to o be able to uand inctly; ot their meaning escaped him.

        And noo , as trying to s;But ime es, Narcissus, since you    a mot love. it a mot die."

        er t could not be uood. t t by , c words burned like fire in .
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