Lindo Jong

        I once sacrificed my life to keep my parents promise. to you, because to you promises mean noter    promise to e to dinner, but if sraffic jam, if ss to ce movie on tV, she no longer has a promise.

        I e. to e bad marry t;Promise! Promise! , my promise is as good as gold." to t    e back.    is only fourteen carats.

        to    carats isnt real gold. Feel my bracelets. t be ty-four carats, pure inside and out.

        Its too late to c Im telling you t your baby. I    someday s;t. Ill never fet you." But later, s    sher.

        In to o marry raigs to cry. "Yes," s last, and they marry forever.

        t my case. Instead, ty family old me t all. It ime, very    and dusty outside, and I could rees in our ord my brotting in my mot sticky arms. I    of me floated a small bird    of me ery "s; sounds. , rao taiyuan peoples ears.

        t my face    talking. tery voice ed face t ing. tree trunk. S at me, t ted lady.

        Of course, runk lady caitai, to marry. No, its not true    depends on    h a good    color.

        tc me: "A marriage bination." Sted my arm and I pusaitai    tot so, not s o be a ;

        And taitai looked do me rate my ts and see my future iions. I     at me like t of eeto swallow me down in one piece.

        troto aitais son,    a baby, one year youyan-yu—tyan for "sky," because ant, and yu, meaning "leftovers," because yan-yu over of . But s urion to take ead. So tched him carefully, made all his decisions, and he became very spoiled.

        But even if I ting sucer. t    to give up stupid old-fasoms. In oties already, a man could cs permission of course. But    off from type of ne. You er in anoty, only if told stories of sons s out into treet. So, taiyuaio cers-in-lao their graves.

        Because I o treating me as if I beloo somebody else. My moto me o my faany times, "Look aitais daug."

        My mot treat me t love me. Sing bague, so s wis was no longer hers.

        I ually a very obedient etimes I    or tired or very ill. t;Suc    you and our o make my face uglier.

        "Its no use," my mot;e ract. It ot be broken." And I would cry even harder.

        I didnt see my future il I side of taiyuan. My family lived in a modest tory    t, and t on a little eps to    it    turies of    o stle c oaiyua-moving spots. In t ill, h cold.

        O to t many fis slippery creatures plucked    even after tted tails    pan.

        t    sale boy.    off,    a baby.

        Later I . And o eat everyt inky pickle and not a s cake.

        So I didnt ant love for my future elevision today. I t of troublesome cousin. I learo be polite to to aitai. My motoai and say, " do you say to your mot; And I    knourn to my real mot;Excuse me, Ma," and turn to aitai and present tle goodie to eat, saying, "For you, Mot; I remember it tle dumpling I loved to eat. My motold aitai I s steamy sides    onto te.

        My life cely    destroyed all t my family ed t year and made to e. Even our op of ttle ory, ure icky mud. tyards tered ed trees, broken bits of walls, and dead chis mess.

        You couldnt go to an insuranpany back ted your oies. My fat to move to uso t t for me, ely. I e from my family and live he huangs.

        t pot no true to ture and bedding o be left beo te practical. t    stop my mot of a tablet of red jade.    it around my neck, sed very stern, so I kne disgrace us," s;Act ;

        t o touc    time I realized tter position tand ai and tyan-yu had such long noses.

        one-and-e supplies, ots and t buildings stood the main house.

        I ared at t ions. It    really so old or remarkable, but I could see it ories, one for ea: great-grandparents, grandparents, parents, and c ily built and tions ing too many opinions. t level    of river rocks ive it toop level opped ile roof. to make tant, to t door. ted red, as aitai,    the roof.

        I kind of prete floor, s. taiables and c of red lacquer, fine pillo style, and many precious t gave tige. t of table and noisy s of ty relatives. I tion t in o make two.

        No big celebration ai didnt ing me in t floor. tyan-yu    to greet me. Instead, aitai airs to to tc usually go. ts. So I kneanding.

        t first day, I stood in my best padded dress at table and began to cables. I could not keep my eady. I missed my family and my stomac bad, knoermio s ai could never accuse my mot    from our family.

        As I    ooping over table gutting a fis me from tell aitai. So I gave a big smile and sed, " a lucky girl I am. Im going to    life." And in t oo close to ;S;— kind of fool are you? And I kne declaration of    tricked myself into t migrue.

        I sayan-yu at till a fe ed like a big o make me cry.     enoug . ed until I    doo eat and t face w him.

        Over t feai instructed ts to teaco seure familys name. ied aitai used to say as sroduced me to a neask. I dont taitai ever soiled    s calling out orders and criticism.

        "teaco er runs clear.    eat muddy rice," so a cook servant.

        Anotime, sold a servant to so    a c: "Make    o to make sure its ." t    o cook so    I could smell if t stuffing oo salty before I even tasted it. I could sec looked as if ted on. And even aitai plained in a pretend ma sy blouse on t hes every day.

        After a    errible life, no, not really. After a    day?    isfying taitai nod and pat my rokes? er seeing tyan-yu eat a    its taste or my looks? Its like tV t a stain so tter than new.

        you see    o tyan-yu as a god, someoai as my real moted to please, someone I s question.

        urned sixteen on taitai told me so    spring. Even if I    ed to marry, rong as a he Japanese were in every er of a.

        "ted guests," said tyan-yus grandmot;and ts ai e plans, but our wedding was very small.

        Sire village and friends and family from oties as    do RSVP. It    polite not to e. aitai didnt ture o an impressive do parlor. aitai aken care to remove all ter and mud marks. So e feliessages on red banners, as if my parents tions to gratulate me on my good luck. And so rent a red palanquin to carry me from o the wedding ceremony.

        A lot of bad luck fell on our tly round and bigger time of t teention, it began to rain, a very bad sign. ning began, people fused it    leave their houses.

        I er t poor aitai ed many o e, and finally, s out of o start t could s che war.

        I    to e doting at a small dressing table by an open o cry and t bitterly about my parents promise. I s muddy broers. I t about to t royed my familys ras    life is about to end.

        It started to rain again, just a ligairs called up to me once again to s became more urgent, more strange.

        I asked myself,    is true about a person? ould I c still be tains bloside rain     time I could see t see tself, but I could see it carried ter t filled tryside. It caused men to yelp and dance.

        I     rong. I    no one could see, t no one could ever take ahe wind.

        I to myself. And ts up. But underill knes    myself.

        t see anyt of me. But ives ainers es. And to e out for a free meal. I even sas and t o make ty look bigger.

        Someoook my o my fate. But I was no longer scared. I could see w was inside me.

        A ed talked too long about pue. tc our birtes and ility. I tipped my veiled o see.

        tyan-yus ced bot;t; tyan ya    me.    acted as if    claimed tire courtyard by fanning ill-s tail.

        I saced red dle in a gold    to a nervous-looking servant. t o d all nigo make sure    out. In tco s, a little piece of black as;tinuously at bot going out. t ever be broken."

        I still    remember. t dle     to divorce. It meant I couldnt divord I couldnt ever remarry, even if tyan-yu died. t red dle o seal me forever erward.

        And sure enoug t m and s I know w really ayed up all nig my marriage.

        After t, our small y puso to our small bedroom. People c s. t tyan-yus age made us sit on turn red side our open o jump into my husbands arms.

        After everyo,    t es, still listening to tside.    gre, tyan-yu said, "t;    to me. I ed until    up quietly and    outside, doairs and into tyard.

        Outside it smelled as if it    and feeling t    still iyard I could see tc t open ing at a table, looking very sleepy as ts special gold    doree to ce being decided for me.

        I must artled as    to lose its oo, I t, and no and t of tyard and do and o, I ill laug a little he breeze.

        I    ted me up and my feet ran me across tyard to t room. But I    dle go out. It fluttered a little and t do still b. My t filled    it finally burst and ble my he dle.

        I immediately s a knife    me do noto my room    guilty steps.

        t m t in front of tyan-yu, s, and myself. "My job is done," so ts shame-faced, mournful look.

        I learo love tyan-yu, but it is not op of me and do ime I    into our bedroom, my anding up. But during t montou    on my sofa.

        In front of s, I     as taugructed to kill a fres until pure juice came out. I rain to a boer. I gave to , murmuring good onic soup called tounau,     ingredients t guarantee long life for mother-in-law very much.

        But it    enougo keep aitai and I ting in t my c a pet frog I once kept named Big ind. aitai seemed restless, as if s of ood up from o me, and slapped my face.

        "Bad ; s;If you refuse to sleep o feed you or clot; So ts    my o avoid    I said noto my parents to be an obedient wife.

        t nig on tyan-yus bed and ed for o touc . I    nigraig to ill    touigook off my gown.

        ts yan-yu. urned    it tle boy ly toyan-yu. It    like t more like ter protects a younger brot my go to o be afraid. I yanyu. oucable bed to sleep on.

        After more montomacs remained small and flat, aitai fleo anot;My son says ed enoug must be you are doing somet; And after t so t    spill out so easily.

        O is so muco lie in bed all day, never getting up. But I tell you it aitai became a little crazy.

        Sold ts to take all s of tting off    geion. S trate and t imes a day, a very nice servant girl o my room, apologizing time asting medie.

        I e times as I c girl, standing in tyard, bargaining raveling s girls, scolding a easing voice.

        One day, after t as, aitai called tco td taitai about my nature. Finally, tc;Its clear s. Your dauger, a ial, ions and noal. Soo balao ;

        turned out to be joyous neai, for ster to reclaim all o ile. And it oo. Because after t lig al. You begin to t person. t day I started to t    breaking my promise to my family.

        It e simple. I made t o get rid of me, t to say tract    valid.

        I t about my plan for many days. I observed everyone arous ts tival of Pure Brigs must be clear as you prepare to t your aors. ts to to clear to sones and tual food. Os not a somber day, more like a piic, but it o someone looking frandsons.

        On t day, I yan-yu and tire    took aitai a long time to e into my room. "s ; s;Go make ." But finally, after my    stop, so my room, scoldi top of her voice.

        I cerrible pain. I e ving, because aitai drew bad grew small like a scared animal.

        "s tle daugell me quickly," she cried.

        "Os too terrible to too terrible to say," I said between gasps and more wailing.

        After enoug ;I ; I reported. "Our aors came to me and said ted to see our yan-yu and I ors. e sac t to t to cors ;

        aitai looked impatient as I began to cry softly again. "But t left t. And our aors became very angry. ted t t tyan-yus end of t! Our aors said tyan-yu ;

        tyan-yus face turned    aitai only fro; a stupid girl to ; And to go back to bed.

        "Mot; I called to ;Please dont leave me! I am afraid! Our aors said if tter is not settled, tru."

        " is t; cried aitai, turning back toyan-yu folloo t.

        "t believe me," I said in a remorseful tone, "because t    to leave ts of my marriage. So our aors said t to sting."

        " nonsense from your stupid ; said aitai, sig s resist. " signs?"

        "In my dream, I sa;

        "tyan-yus grandfat; asked aitai. I nodded, remembering ting I he wall.

        ",    on tyan-yus back, and t    ayan-yus fles as it ate aors face before ;

        aitai quickly turo tyan-yu and pulled    up. "Ai-ya!" s ip, just as I    t five monter and brother.

        "And tor toud I patted my c already . "eetart to fall out one by one, until I could no longer protest leaving t;

        aitai pried open my mout ioot four years ago.

        "And finally, I sa girls o e from a bad family. But s;

        I lay my oo tired to go on. aitai pus; does ;

        " girl is tyan-yus true spiritual ed o tyan-yus c;

        By mid-m tc over to our racted errible fession.

        And after muc girl I liked so mucceasing voice bee smaller wer, I ach fear and worry.

        So you    imagiell trut ry. I er sruck yan-yu ss traves not just once a year, but once a day.

        to tory. t blame me so mucaitai got    my cloticket to Peking, and enougo go to America. t I ell anybody of any importance about tory of my doomed marriage.

        Its a true story,    my promise, al I oo your brots. ttle extra money, I buy anot. I knoy-four carats, all genuine.

        But Ill never fet. On tival of Pure Brigake off all my bracelets. I remember t and could follo. t    tet myself.

        is to be t girl again, to take off my scarf, to see ness e bato my body!
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